THERE'S AN AP FOR THAT

 

The one thing that separates generations is technology. I remember growing up, just about anything kids wanted to learn they would be taught by their parents, teachers or other peers. Now, grown-ups go to their kids for help navigating their devices like cell phones, laptops and tablets that are all computerized. Wow, how the world has changed!

Just doing everyday tasks seems to require a master’s degree in computer science. There is online banking, online teledocs, online lawyers, online school courses and even online dating…talk about replacing the personal touch!

Even in the home, you no longer just cook and make coffee. Instead, you program the coffee maker, the microwave, the dishwasher and even the new-fangled washing machines. They say an Instapot will do it all for you, well, it would certainly be nice if they had a button on them that would program themselves to cook the food. Remember when we could just cook the food on the stove and actually wash the clothes in the washer without spending a half hour trying to figure out how to work the contraption?

All these gadgets that are supposed to simplify our lives are actually making them more complicated. But alas, I have been told repeatedly not to worry that there is an ap for that. There is literally an ap for everything these days. I’d be willing to bet that there is an ap for an ap. Probably out there somewhere there actually is!

 

PASSWORDS.

 

I have been slow to catch on but my friend Steph finally has gotten through to me that anything you want to know, you can google. Miss Google knows everything about everything. I lost all my icons on my one laptop’s desktop so I googled it on another laptop how to get them back. When I was away from home, my laptop screen went blank so I googled it on my phone how to get it back. Later, I couldn’t connect to the Internet on my phone so I googled that on my laptop. Although it’s comforting to know that help is just a click away, it is also a little daunting that Miss Google is literally EVERYWHERE.

If this isn’t enough to boggle your mind, then passwords will. The idea is so simple, you set a password to protect your account and your privacy. I have found that most accounts are so good at protecting my privacy that they won’t even let me in!

How many times have you set up an account and used it and changed absolutely nothing but when you go to access it the next time, either the password or username doesn’t match. Nothing changed in the meantime. My thought on this is that there really are little gremlins somewhere out there in cyberspace that just love to go in the wee hours of the night and mess with our passwords. Not to worry though, somewhere out there is another password that we can set to stop this…I just haven’t found it yet! But, there’s an ap for that!

 

GREMLINS IN THE PRINTER.

 

The same gremlins must be at work with my printer and scanner. The last printer had a problem printing. It would scan, copy but would not print. After all, didn’t it know it was a printer! Did you notice that I said the last printer? Yep, it tried my patience and got replaced.

The replacement at least knows that it is a printer. However, it likes a lot of attention. That must be the case because I go through the same motions every time I want to print or scan and, instead of it just doing the job, it asks me all sorts of questions: “Am I ready?” Well yea, or I wouldn’t have told it to print!” “Do you want the same size, portrait or landscape, lighter or darker?” Why can’t it just print the 10^th page just like it printed the previous nine? I know, there’s an ap for that somewhere!

Also, there is no such thing as just plugging a device in and having it work. It seems like every gadget has to be programmed. I was going to unplug my router when I switch Internet providers. No…it has to be re-programmed. When I did get my new printer, Steph was literally three hours programming it to “talk” to my laptop. At one point she got to know the tech who was based in the Philipines so well that they were actually discussing the weather while waiting for the printer to go through its set-up. Ridiculous!

 

ALMOST HUMAN.

 

Even though they are made up of wires, circuit boards and other inanimate materials, somehow our technical devices seem almost human sometimes. We are all pretty much used to getting put on hold when we call an establishment. We get to listen to their choice of music for what usually seems like an eternity. As if that weren’t bad enough, my laptop has also been doing it. I try to connect to a site and it asks me, “Please wait.” Well, at least it is polite!

Ron is slowly beginning to make friends with his new phone. It is the first “smart” phone he has had, upgrading from his true and faithful flip phone. Soon after he got it, he was frustrated with it and tossed it down, calling it a dumb*!%*. Immediately, it proceeded to tell him the exact definition of a dumb*!%*. Maybe they are part human!

Even my toaster has a mind of its own. I have a beautiful four-slice toaster at home that toasts anything perfectly the first time. Since Ron is not a fan of toast (too crumby!), I bought a simple ten-dollar one for his place. All I want it to do is toast. Inevitably, if I stand there the toast won’t stay down and as soon as I walk away it gets burned. I just can’t win. But, I bet there is an ap to fix that!

Even the new-fangled waffle maker has a mind of its own. The instructions say not to look until the light goes out. So, I don’t. Finally, the light goes out and, guess what? Yep, it’s beyond crunchy, almost…just almost burned.

 

FRUSTRATION.

 

The one thing that all technological devices have in common is that they do help us release anger. Nope, not with a hammer, although that does quiet them. That has been tried and all that accomplishes is that you need to replace the device with a newer and greater one with newer technology which breeds more frustration.

However, once we get through venting our anger on the devices, we are pretty much mellowed out to be sociable around people.

The world is always changing, sometimes for the better and sometimes not. There have been so many technological advances in modern medicine that can save lives with pinpoint accuracy and yet simple tasks on our everyday devices can drive us mad. The only thing for certain is that smart phones, TV’s and other appliances are here to stay.

It’s like some people like Einstein was a genius in so many ways and lacked common sense. Maybe someday our smart devices will actually be smart enough for us to navigate them! They don’t call them smart devices for nothing. Next time I get frustrated, I’ll just search for an ap because you know, there’s an ap for that!